Protesting

Well today, while on Spring Break, the schools of Nevada met at the State Legislature building to do some protesting! The reason for the protest is the state is possibly planning to cut some costs in education. I have never protested anything before and since I am now a college student, I felt it is my civic duty to protest. Particularly when the protest is about education...MY EDUCATION! I am not trying to sound selfish but I want my damn education thank you very much.

It was quite a large turn-out. We had people from schools all over the state come here to Carson City. I live here in the state capital and the legislature building is like 3 or 4 blocks from my house, so I didn't have to go very far, thank goodness!

Anyways. The problem is the education is looking to be cut, which means the smaller schools, like the one I attend, would go away and the larger universities would nearly double or even triple their tuition costs. It also means cuts for schools K through 12! What the hell? That is not right. Education throughout the US is in the crapper and it seems like it is getting worse. Budget cuts on education are not the way to handle financial instabilities. Bringing in revenue is a better option. Along with about 40 other ideas.

Well the state politicians heard us, along with most of the people in town. It was probably the single most largest assembly they have ever had rally at the legislature building. So I guess that gave them something to think about...hopefully.

I don't wanna have to go to Reno to UNR to finish my schooling. It would be just a pain in the ass. I like my school. It's close(about 2 miles away), it has an awesome nursing program(which is what I am going for by the by), the classes have a smaller amount of students(so the one on one time with the professor is easier to have), it seems to be a good school for the older students(like me) to get their degree, and best of all it is low cost(so I am not spending an arm and a leg for my education)!

I know schools around the country have come across or will come across problems like this when it comes to politicians making decisions regarding education. I know that we live in hard times and I am paying for my own education, so I know money doesn't grow on trees(wish it did)! Taking the opportunity away from people is not the best way to go about cutting state spending! The politicians need to take a good look at themselves first!

Anyways that was how I spent my day. I hope everyone elses was good! Bye for now!

Spring Break

Yippee! I am on Spring Break from college. So what am I gonna do? Absolutely nothin! Well I do have some PS3 games that I have been waiting to play. Yea I have had a PS3 for a year and a half and I have played really only one game. Mostly because our TV sucks but since my mom has moved in we've been using her TV in the living room. Yea we can actually see what we are watching. So we have about 8 PS3 games and I've played only one. Yikes! I gotta lotta catching up to do.

I do plan to be somewhat productive in my week off from school. I am planning to go gun shooting sometime this week...if the weather permits me to do so(it's currently snowing again so we will see what happens)!

My productive goals for the week are minor but I won't be a total sloth and are as follows: I am planning to do a garage clean up(my man cave is a little messy and I just can't have that). Some deep house cleaning is also needed. My mom is planning to paint her room, so I will give a hand with that. Vacuuming my truck...it really needs it. Bathe the kitties(I really don't want to though). Haul off the garbage. Also if the weather allows I will try to get Erin(Lorin's sister) over here so we can finish taking the rest of Amy(Lorin's mom) stuff over to the Washoe House. I am going to try and cook dinner every night(it's usually difficult with me and Lorin being on different schedules).

Well I am just planning on doing all of this in a week. I don't know if I will succeed in my endeavors, but I will try. I will also try to post more this week since I have got some free time. Well tata for now!

Here is something funny!

I saw this banned commercial a long while back. I just decided to post it just because I wanted to brighten everyones week! If you've seen than awesome. If this is your first times seeing it...ohhh...it's funny! A little dirty...but funny!

This was probably the funniest banned commercial I have ever seen! By Mastercard of all kinds of people! I have watched this commercial many times and to me it just doesn't get old. I can watch it again and again and still laugh!



I think that's the kind of dad that I will be when my daughters are older!

Well I hope ya'll have a great day!

Planting balls? What?

Well the other day as our yard was in the middle of clean up. Lorin and I were discussing home improvement stuff...like we do! Now let me just warn you, in my old age I am losing my hearing. Mostly I think it's from loud explosions and gunfire from combat of my days spent in the USMC.

Well anyways! Lorin and I were talking about stuff that we should do with the yard. This is how the conversation went:

Lorin: Well in the front yard where the planter area is closest to the house, we should plant BALLS! You know have a little ball garden.
Gary: What did you just say we should plant?
Lorin: Bulbs!?!?!
Gary: Ohhhh...I thought you said something else!
Lorin: Oh really? Like what?
Gary: I could have swore you said we should plant balls, and have a little ball garden.
Lorin:(Looking rather confused)Why the hell would we plant balls?
Gary: I don't know! That's why I asked you to repeat what you said.
Lorin: What the hell is a ball garden?
Gary: Like I said, I don't know. I thought it was a rather strange idea too! Can you imagine it. I am sure there are some idiots out there who would probably think to do something like that.
Lorin: Like what?
This is where my imagination takes over!
Gary: Well think about it. Some colossal moron starts to plant some balls to make more balls. He/she plants a tennis ball, a basketball, a ping pong ball, a baseball, a golf ball or any other kind of ball with hopes of it growing into a lovely tree that produces said balls!
Lorin: (Sarcastically)Yea...'cause that's where balls come from right?
Gary: (Responding sarcastically)Didn't you know? I thought that everybody knew that! You know, ball farmers growing organic balls for peoples entertainment! Can you imagine that?
Lorin: You know some people are really dumb enough to try it.
Gary: Oh I am certain of that. Hey I think I might blog about this.
Lorin: Oh you should definitely blog about our "ball" garden!

So that's the kind of conversations we have late at night! I know I know...we are nutso! But hey we're cute!

Well also, the landscapers are done with the yard. It is now a bare dirt lot in the front and back yard. Yippee! No more rocks! Now we can plant some damn grass. I would much rather mow the yard than to look at a rock yard. So phase 1 of the yard of death is complete!

The yard of death!

Well we are nearly at an end for the yard of death! Ok. So we have this front yard right? Well it's the ugliest yard in the neighborhood. Seriously! We have had neighbors come to knock on our door to complain. My usual response is "hey I would rather have a working toilet/washer and dryer/refrigerator/stove/etc... than a beautiful yard!" They usually turn their noses up at me and say shit like "well you should do something about it anyways!" Where upon I say things like "oh...are you paying for it?" or "I plan to when money isn't so tight" or "no...really? I just like it looking hideous it gives the house charm!"

Well the days of making up excuses and snarky remarks are nearly at its end. When we moved here the front yard had rocks for the front yard! No grass just a rock yard. Well over the last few years weeds blow in from whereabouts unknown and start to grow through the damn rocks. Ordinarly I wouldn't care and I would just mow the yard regularly so no one could even tell there are weeds there without stopping and looking real close. Well ROCKS! I can't mow rocks. I would have to get a weed eater to do that and a really good one at that because those are just fiesty weeds. Industrial strength weed killer doesn't do much to them!

So that is just a minor description of what our yard has looked like for the last few years. Seeing it...is worse...trust me! Well my mom paid these landscapers to come in and remove the rocks and do a general yard clean up for a very reasonable fee. I guess landscaping work in the winter is hard to come by, so they are doing it "dirt" cheap(hehehe pun was intended)! So tomorrow is supposedly their last day. They just have to finish with the clean up. Most of the rocks are now GONE! I am doing a happy dance right now! I'd show you but I am not that cruel!

So I will keep ya'll up to date on the goings on in my life!

Corn nuts!

I have to say that I really HATE corn nuts. Everytime I smell them I gag and damn near vomit. I don't know what it is about them that makes me almost up-chuck but there is just something about the way they smell.

In class there is this guy beside me and I think that corn nuts is all he eats. I see him all over campus munching away on them. I had to move across the room the other day just so I wouldn't throw up on him(or myself).

The smell of corn nuts almost angers me. No really! I want to start punching people when I see them eating them or just for good measure so they know not to eat corn nuts around me! Problem is I just can't start punching people for no reason. That's not cool! Well maybe...

As I said I don't know where this comes from. The smell of corn, popcorn or any other corn product does not do this to me...just corn nuts. This goes for any flavor of the product corn nuts! I don't know if anyone else feels this way about corn nuts or any other snack foods. I just hope I am not the only CRAZY person out there!

This post is rather disgusting so don't read if you're not in the mood

Not to be gross or anything, but Taco Bell makes my ass hurt! No...I think I will be gross! As much as I enjoy my Taco Bell, it sure gives me the shits! We had the Bell last night and I am forseeing a day of being on the toilet cursing the day it was ever thought up! Screaming "oh my gosh what was I thinking!"

Do you ever just gross yourself out while pooping? I have been on the toilet going poo and the sound of my bum and the sloshing water was just awful. I thought to myself "how did I get here crying and gagging in the bathroom?" or "dear God let me leave this bathroom alive!" or "I hope nobody heard that!"

Have you ever called others over to come and look at what you just defecated? I have. When I was a younger man I asked a fellow Marine to have a look at the turd I just shat. As he is walking up I said "doesn't my turd kind of resemble the country Italy?" Or another time in the USMC, where I was out in field and had dug a 2 feet deep hole in the ground to shit in. The damn thing was sticking out about 5 or 6 inches out of the hole. That was a masterpiece! Eating MRE's(meals ready to eat) for several weeks will do that to you!

Have you ever farted and grossed yourself out by the smell? Yup! That one has happened to me also! No stories on that one. It usually happens after Taco Bell though! I can sometimes clear a room.

Do you ever use public restrooms and hope that no one comes in while you are taking a dump? I generally don't poop in public restrooms, but I have when it has been too much for me to hold. Once while doing number 2, someone came in...coughed a couple of times...then ran out screaming! Well this was gross yes, but the worst part was that it was a womans voice I heard. Yup! I had just taken a dump in the wrong bathroom. As I sat there fully embarassed, I wondered to myself how exactly I was going to leave this bathroom without getting noticed? Because I could hear the woman outside of the bathroom door chatting with someone. I could only imagine that her and her lady friend(s) were waiting outside just to see who it was that made such a stink! So what the hell was I going to do? I came up with an idea that I am not proud of. I finished, put on my best performance, and walked out.(I am not trying to offend anyone by telling you what I did, so I am so very sorry if it does) I came out of the bathroom and pretended to be mentally handicapped(as I said I am not proud of that)! She and her two friends were nearby and had mortified looks on their faces. Then they just walked away mumbling to each other sheepishly and from the sound of it they were embarassed for waiting there to see who came out! YES! My plan worked!

Ok well that's all the grossness I can muster for one day. I hope that this amuses you. I also hope that this post has not offended anyone in anyway. Thank you and have a nice day!

Oh by the by

Hey does anyone know what happened to the bloggers from Ireland, Hazel and Paul? I haven't seen them post for like ever and stuff. Maybe they're doing like me and taking a hiatus from the blogging world. I dunno! Well I was just pondering that, so if anyone knows I about them I am quite curious.

Ok...ok...I will post something already!

Geez! It has been quite a while since I posted anything as some have stated(Countess and Paige) but well I just honestly haven't been in the mood. It's not that I don't like you guys or anything, it's just that I am busy with my schooling and I really haven't been in the mood to blog.

I have attempted a few times to write and even managed to finish a few of them, but when I reread them my perfectionist streak came out and I never posted them. So alas, that is what is wrong with my little bloggy blog!

So I am in some interesting classes. I managed to skip out of a math class into the next higher math course. Apparently in my old age I have gotten better at math! Who knew! No really! I sucked at math all throughout my years in elementary school and high school. It was always my lowest grade. Now that I am in my 30's math seems to come easier! Hmmmm!

I am taking a Anthropology class. It's a little different but somehow I am yet again the class leader when it comes to discussions. Why do I always have to be the Alpha male? Or Alpha at all? I always seem to be the only one who wants to talk during class discussions. Last semester in the "sex" class I did most of the talking there too! So much that the teacher even said something to me after class. It was a little insulting but I just brushed it off and the following 2 weeks I didn't say a word. I think he noticed that no one wanted to do any talking. So he looks at me and directly asks what I think, just to get somebody talking!

I am in a Humanities class, which is basically a class on history. I LOOOOVE history so this should be a breeze.

Then there is my English class. I had the same teacher in a previous English class, so I know how he teaches and how he grades. Plus I am yet again...the class clown. English comes easy to me so this one should also be easy cheesy!

I also just realized how close I really am to that nursing degree. A few weeks ago I was planning out what classes to take for each semester and then I realized how few classes I actually had left to take. Which is a good thing because that GI Bill money stops January 2014. I know that sounds like a long ways but when I sat down and wrote it down...it really isn't. The GI Bill is only available during the first 10 years your out of the military. Well due to crazy-ass ex-wife I had to put off using it. Now I am finally using it and with very little time left on the clock for my degree. So it's sort of a race against time to get my degree before that money runs out! Wish me luck with that.

Well as I have stated previously my mom is now living with me and Lorin. Well since she has been living in Louisiana for the last several years, I warned her that it was going to be much colder than she has been used to. I explained about all the snow we get being this close to Lake Tahoe. I went on and on... Then...as soon as we arrived, back in January...NO FUCKING SNOW! It apparently all melted. Ok! Not only that but it was warm!?!?!? Huh? What the hell? It has been like fricken Spring for the last month. I guess all those in the Mid-West and North East got all of our damn snow! Seriously? It was shorts wearing weather here. Well low and behold...the snow finally came back! It hasn't stopped snowing for the past two days now. Oy! I forgot how much I hate shoveling the snow off our sidewalks and driveway. See that's what I get for being all pissy about not having any snow.

Well other than that nothing new to report SIR! So I bid you good-day!

I am back

Well I came back from Louisiana a couple of days ago. Sorry I haven't been in much of a blogging mood due to all the work that I have been doing and utter exhaustion. I just figured I would let you know that I am back and stuff.

My mom and I successfully navigated our way out here to Northern Nevada. We did make some stops along the way. I will post those pics as soon as I have a chance. My mom had never driven out west of Texas before. She just mostly flew. So seeing her reaction to the vastness of the American West was just amusing.

I got to see a lot of my friends from Louisiana, where I grew up, and that was soo much fun. One of the best parts of being back there...was THE FOOD! Gosh I have missed some good old Louisiana cooking!

Most of my friends back there I haven't seen in over a decade. So it was good to see them and pick at them on much they've changed...or haven't. For the most part they were shocked that I looked exactly the same as I did when they last saw me. So I guess I still look like a youngster...even if I am not!

It had been over 8 years since I last saw my mom. I know that sounds horrible but there is a reason. My mom's ex-husband wouldn't allow her to come visit me, and my ex-wife wouldn't allow me to go and visit my mom, nor did she want her visiting me. I barely got to speak on the phone with her. Lorin had never met my mom until now. She had spoken on the phone with her several times but neither my mom nor I could afford to visit one another. I was very excited for my Lorin to meet my mom...finally! Lorin seems all excited and seems to like my mom, and my mom very much likes her. My mom said to me while we were on the road, your ex-wife took you away from me and Lorin has brought you back to me. Now I am no way a mama's boy(that position is reserved for my little brother) but my mom and I are sooo very much alike, so there is a closeness there.

So exciting, mom is living with us now. Well that's about all for now. The ladies of the house are nagging me to go and do stuff with them instead of being our normal home bodies that we are. So we are off to lunch, a movie, shopping and then dinner!

Good Idea Bad Idea

Well I used to love the cartoon show Animaniacs, so I decided I would give a few humorous Good Idea Bad Idea clips.






This one is just gross!





Well that's all for now I hope you are amused or even chuckled a little bit or cracked a smile or laughed out loud or peed yourself a little from the humor or just generally liked it!

I am leaving to go to Louisiana for a little while.

Well hi there reader! I am off to Louisiana(where I am from) for a little while. I don't know for how long. I'm sure that it won't be longer than 2 weeks. It is just somewhere between a week and 2 weeks.

Anyways! My mom is moving here to Northern Nevada to be with Me and Lorin and to be our live in Nanny for our bundle of joy that is coming. Our baby should be born sometime around June. So we are just getting a head start on things.

Well my mom is flying me out to Louisiana, so I can help her with the move to Nevada. I will be there for some days, visiting old friends and helping my mom with the packing of the U-haul truck. Then we'll be off and back here. I will probably do most of the driving...well because my mom's driving has always scared the living hell out of me! No...really! She drives like she owns the road and likes to hug one side or the other of the lane she is in. So since I would rather us make it here alive I will mostly be driving. I don't think I would be able to control my bowels if she was driving this big moving truck! Ahhh...I think I just shit myself thinking about it!



So I will spend the next several days, before I leave, cleaning up. That way it will be ready for her to move in when we arrive. I have managed to get a lot done already but there is still some more moving of Lorin's mom's stuff to get over to the other house. It has been a little difficult with all the bitchy weather(snow) and all.

So I am gonna be busy for the next several weeks. After I get back school will be starting up shortly there after. So I have got to get my crap together for another semester. I will be advancing to higher math classes, so that'll be fun(cough...cough...clearing throat)! I also have some other classes to take to qualify for my major in Nursing.

So, just to let you know I leave on Friday, so I won't be around much to post anything or leave perverted comments. I will be back though!

Some things to know in order to survive a zombie apocalypse

Just to warn you this is a really long, but amusing, post!



Zombies are the undead humans that are only after one thing...to eat you. It's not out of necessity, it's just out of a primal instinct we have to fill the void that is hunger. These are some things you should know in order to survive a zombie uprising. Your own survival is necessary because these beings cannot be stopped. The human race is depending on you!

It is now 2011 and there are some things you should know before getting too comfortable with the new year! ZOMBIES!!!

Now some of you may not believe that zombies will take over and that's ok. But if it does happen...I will survive a zombie apocalypse! Here is why. I will be prepared. Yes I know that I sound like some sort of boy scout...well I was, but that's beside the point. I know its silly and fictional but I would like to be ready none the less. I am not saying that I am one of those nutty people who think the end is near or anything. I just like to amuse myself in the possibility of a zombie invasion. So anyhoo...

-First off is COMMON FRICKIN SENSE
Now zombies don't have much brain activity going on up there, so reasoning with them is out of the question. Now I know some people might try, well let me just tell you right now...you are a dumbass! No really...you are! It's like trying to reason with a shark. Do you really think that a zombie(or a shark) is not interested in negotiating? No! Use your brain!

Now you must pay attention to your surroundings. Going somewhere alone...is just not a good idea. Traveling in groups is a fine idea, just don't have too big of a group or you might just end up being a buffet!

Places with one entrance/exit can be ok. However, keep this in mind, if you're surrounded by zombies, just how in the hell do you plan on getting away? Sure you have them at a choke-point and they can only come at you from one direction, but just how do you plan to kill a million or more in one sitting? Yea...not too sensible unless you are Chuck Norris.

Yes, these zombies you come across might be your friends or family that you once loved, but keep in mind that they are no longer that same person anymore. Don't allow your feelings of who they once were to get in the way of your better judgement! Whether it be a child or your grandma, do not let this stop you from putting him/her down!



If you have seen the movie Zombieland, there are some useful tips on there. Use those tips as necessary. They may save your life!



I can't say for sure which is better. Traveling at night or during the day. I would think daytime travel would be the most preferred. Because yes, the zombies can see you...but guess what? You can see THEM too! Zombies do not have night vision, but they do follow their most primal senses. So beware! If you try to travel at night you need light(or if you have night vision goggles...than good for you for being so wise and prepared), zombies are attracted to light among other things, so they will most likely come after you while you have your light glowing. Not good!

-Next is knowing your enemy
As I have stated earlier, zombies aren't too bright! They do have a few things on their side. For starters, they have numbers. Yes a zombie by itself is not nearly the most dangerous thing in the world. There are much more lethal things you can come across like a velociraptor with a jet pack and scissors. Which is in fact the deadliest thing on earth!



Uhh! I am getting off topic here so nevermind. You can fight or flee(whatever you prefer) rather easily when up against a pack of zombies. Know this, one zombie can turn many other people into zombies. So keep your distance, unless you want to be apart of the brain-devouring lot!

Zombies do not fear you. You are a walking Happy Meal to them. Who would be afraid of that? They also are undead, so they cannot feel pain, pity, remorse, or love. Keep that in mind when you are faced with a hoard of flesh eaters. If you find that you're out numbered and have no way to defend yourself, your best option is to run! Hiding can be fine, but do remember YOU can die of thirst and starvation...they can't!

Now I know there are a lot of myths about zombies and I am not going to get into too much detail, because well...I just don't know what to expect for sure.

One myth is zombies are slow moving. Well this may be true but don't overlook the fact that they may be fast-moving-zombies. They may eventually slow down after they've been dead a while but do beware of the fast movers.

Another, is that not only can their bite turn you into the undead, but so can a scratch or saliva on your skin. Is this true? I can't say for sure. Don't take any chances until you know. Dressing up in a full leather outfit with a motorcycle helmet may not be a bad idea. Sure, you will be sweaty and your movement might be limited, but hey...how do you know that the scratch or saliva myth is false? Leather is something that retains your own body sweat so it will prevent zombie bodily fluids from getting on your naked skin. Leather also is something that a human mouth can not bite through. Sooo...keep that in mind!

One thing that is almost certain is that to kill a zombie you have to shoot it in the head or in some way damage the brain. Whether a shot to the brain, bludgeoning the zombie in the head, or beheading entirely, it's purely up to you how you want to kill the zombie. Which brings me to my next topic.

-Weapons
Now, you can have a variety of useful weapons in your fight against the army of the undead. I know there are some places (and some people as well), that are against guns or do not have access to such firepower. If you live in such a place...you are somewhat fucked! However, you do have useful tools that can be made into weapons. As you might be ever so worried, fear not! These items do not jam or run out of ammunition, so your destruction of the zombie nation might not be foiled. You just might be more inconvienced as you have to get a bit closer than you would like to to kill the zombie. So I will start with these such items or weapons!
1)A baseball bat. Crude...yes, but effective!
2)A crowbar. It won't break and you can smash or jab the hooked end into your zombie foe.
3)A pitchfork. Well unless you live on a farm or are near a hardware store(which btw has many other makeshift weapons available) availability may be limited.
4)A claw hammer. Same reasoning as the crowbar.
5)A machete. Very useful for beheadings.
6)Any kind of fixed-handled knife is useful. Just make sure you know what you are doing with that knife, so you don't end up a snack!
7)Whatever kind of extended handled yardwork device is a plus.
8)A car. Just make sure that you don't slow down enough for them to break through the windows. A tank would be better, but in reality a tank is less likely to be available.

Now these are some things you don't want to use unless you have to.
1)First and foremost, fire or any kind of flame throwing device, such as a gasoline pump and a zippo, is a BAD IDEA! Zombies don't feel pain! So they will still come after you, but now they are on fire too! Not helpful! Imagine being in a building with a zombie on fire...not a happy thought huh? Everything they touch would most likely catch on fire and there you are trapped...in a fire! Not too smart!
2)Any kind of object that makes noise(unless its a gun). For example, a bullhorn or a foghorn, would be useful if you are trying to BRING the zombie population toward you. Chances are that this is not your intention, unless your plan is like mine(this is a private story that those who know me, have heard about). Everybody knows that zombies are attracted to bright flashes, bright colors, and loud noises.
3)A flare gun. Really? Who the hell would use this to kill a zombie?
4)Glass bottles. Sure you might be able to harm or even kill a zombie, but then again you might accidentally cut yourself too! This would make you a target, for not only the bodily fluids of the zombie you just maimed, but also for any other nearby zombies who smell the blood(think of sharks)!
5)Spraying a fire extinguisher at a zombie. This is about as effective as a wet noodle. Just use the damn thing to bash its head in already!
6)Anything that is just too heavy for you to wield is a bad idea entirely. Sure you might get one or two, but what happens when you are too tired from weaving this heavy object at a zombie? Plus, you will certainly have to do some running. Do you really want to weigh yourself down with an object that you might only get to use once?
7)Poison of any kind. Honestly, do you really think that this would work on something that is undead?

Now GUNS, they are rather useful in a zombie take over. Now I know some of you may be thinking, "gosh this guy is some kind of crazy redneck with guns"! No! I am not a redneck...I just like guns and trucks.

If you are opposed to using a gun or afraid of them...that won't last long. Why? Because well if you're afraid of a gun...zombies are scarier, so you'll get over that fear pretty damn quick or end up dead anyway. If you just don't like guns because you're an asshole, well then you either 1. get over yourself and pick up a firearm or 2. get killed by the hoard of flesh eating zombies because you were too self absorbed to use your head to think with instead of using it as a hat rack!

1)Shotgun. This is probably the single most useful gun in the fight against the zombie hoard. Why? Because, most likely you have pellet shells that spread, thus taking out multiple zombies with one shot. Less ammo you have to use! Brilliant! Also, a shotgun is relatively east to use. There are many different kinds of shotguns, the preferred is a pump action 12 gauge. This is the most common type and so you can find ammunition rather easily. There are the over and under double barrel, side to side double barrel, single shot, semi-automatic, pump action, or(if you can find one) automatic shotguns. Shotguns also have various gauge types, so make sure you have the right ammunition for your shotgun. It really doesn't matter what kind of shotgun you use...just have one!







2)A revolver. I personally prefer pistols that are magazine fed but a revolver is a preferred weapon against zombies. Why? Because with any magazine fed gun you have to reload the magazine. Unlike on movies, you DO have a limited number of shots in you gun! Stopping to reload a magazine is a chore and time consuming(which you may not have much of), so unless you are carry 20 fully loaded magazines with you at any old time, you might want to have a gun that is easily reloadable and you can just carry the spare bullets with you. The unfortunate part of a revolver is that there ARE a limited number of shots you have, so make em count!



3)Pistol of any kind are fine. Magazine fed pistols are great but just make sure you have spare magazine with you that you can reload and for Gods sake don't just drop the clip on the ground and leave it(unless you have to)! It's not the movies and you do not have an unlimited amount of those either. A pistol only successfully works with a magazine. If you don't have a magazine in your pistol, than guess what? You have a gun that only carries and fires one shot at a time! That sucks!

Whether it's a .45 caliber


A 9mm pistol


Or Gary's personal favorite the Glock .40 caliber


Pistols are almost a neccessity for the zombie apocalypse. They are small, easily carried, powerful weapons! Sometimes you need a gun that is meant for close quarters and that's what a pistol is made for.

4)Automatic rifles and machine pistols. Sure they can be helpful, by means that they don't need to be rechambered to fire a single shot and you can spray and pray! They also have a lot of ammunition that can be fired in a sitting. Do beware that the magazines do need to be reloaded! Like I said...not a movie!





5)A drum-fed semi-automatic shotgun. What? Yes...that's what you heard all right! If you can get a hold of one of these babies...you're mostly in the clear. With this ingenious firearm, you are a one man(or woman) zombie killing machine! Just be sure to keep a couple of fully loaded drums with you! As the drums do hold a metric shit-ton of ammo, you do have to reload eventually!


Say hello to my little friend...you zombie bastards!

Any gun will do...but just make sure you know what you are doing, have a supply of readily available ammunition, and have lots of guns with you just to be on the safe side. If you don't have a lot of ammunition, don't worry...you may come across some on the way. Just make sure you are not carrying some kind of specialty gun that requires a specific kind of ammo or you might just find yourself up a creek without a paddle!

-A plan
Now you might just be the type who likes to wing it by the seat of his/her pants. That can be fine and dandy. But a plan is most useful.

A place to fortify is very helpful but make sure you have provisions. You don't want to try waiting them out...they'll last longer! I am not saying build yourself a compound or anything(like some people I know). I am just saying that you should have a place that you can rest and protect yourself.

A compound might be fun and useful. I mean you can stay there for days, weeks, months, years and not be harmed. You can also be a place of refuge for fellow survivors. I personally plan to fortify the shit out of a walmart that is nearby. Why? Because a walmart has weapons, food, water, other provisions, back-up generators, and can easily be used as a stronghold to gather your strength before you take on the zombies. I think that walmarts were built around the world for just this purpose. Why else would there be so many?

An armored RV would be grand, but lets face it...who the hell has the money to do that? I wish I did. I would be set. I could freely move about without the risk of being lunch.



A helicopter! Yes this would be the preferred way to travel. Why? Because unless you are some kind of mutant, humans can't fly...so neither can zombies. Yes, you will have to land at some point and also have to refuel, but what better than to soar the sky above the madness below!



Now here is something to think about. Zombies are dead...or undead! So you need to steer clear of large cities altogether. Yes there are provisions in them, but there are also the masses of zombies that can rip you apart.

The best bet...go North, where it snows and can get to freezing temperatures. Yes, it will be rather uncomfortable in the cold but you are smarter than a zombie. KEEP YOURSELF WARM. They do not think like that. Zombies won't necessarily freeze to death, but it is a sure way to slow them down making them easier for you to dispose of. They may also freeze in ice and therefore, are trapped. You may be safest this way...for a little while anyways!

I have heard that isolated islands are a good place to take refuge. Sure that can be good but what happens when the zombies get hungry enough to walk along the bottom of the water. It's not like they'll drown! Then what? You are stuck on an island with zombies coming at you from all directions. The only plus side is that, being a moving rotting corpse, they are fair game to be eaten by creatures that live in the water like the many kinds of fish, crabs, or even sharks. But don't bet your life on it!

The only other worry for me, is that if humans are not the only ones infected such as animals, birds, or insects. Than we are all doomed! Just how will anyone survive that? I just don't know. Let us not dwell on that. Most things that infect humans do not infect animals...so that's a plus! Just take caution around other forms of life!

Well I don't know about you but I am, for the most part, ready. Bring em on!
Thank you for reading. Keep in mind, that this was written for my own personal amusement. However, you just never know! So happy hunting!

Happy New Year

Well I would just like to say "Happy New Year" to everybody. Wow...it's already 2011? So just where the hell is my flying car? Or my teleportation machine? Or my very own robot to do household chores? Or my real estate on Mars? I just don't know!

Oh well! Lets just hope this new year brings with it good things.

I will say I absolutely do NOT do New Years resolutions! I won't...I refuse...to take part in that tradition. I don't because like most people I don't keep up with them. Well that is until 9...now 10 years ago when I made a resolution not to do resolutions ever again. I would say that it is working out pretty grand! Now I am not knocking those of you who do the resolutions but I just won't be taking part.

I just hope everybody has had a good 2010. I did! I also hope that ya'll have a good 2011 too!